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Shopping These Days: Feeling Like Snow White And The 7 Dwarfs

Think about the many personalities you transform into when out shopping these days. I seem to transform from Snow White into each of the seven dwarfs.

Remember when you'd set out to go shopping feeling like Snow White: cheerful, kind, trusting, singing and smiling at birds that flew by. Then you'd walk in like Happy singing "Heigh-ho, Heigh-ho, it's shopping I will go." No really, years ago you would walk into a store all happy and excited because you knew exactly what you were there to buy with thoughts of possibly being influenced into purchasing new items you just might need. Along the way someone would ask if you needed help and you would say "Yes" or "No thank you." Then you’d proceed to the check out and leave the store …happy!

These days I start out like Snow White (all smiles) entering a store feeling like Happy, converting into Dopey and Bashful, sneezing like Sneezy, acting a little like Doc and leave like Grumpy. Unless I just so happen to pass Prince Charming. Game Changer!

Now I enter a store smiling like Happy thinking “Hmm, let's see what aisles beckon me to enter and find some neat products” and quickly look around, and transform into Dopey. Why? All around me are products that make me question my intelligence and decisiveness: how healthy am I, how physically fit do I look to others not me, would that help me make a 2- minute dinner? Okay, are there really 2-minute dinner gadgets out there? Where is this product made, what ingredients are on the label. Wait, do we even know what the ingredient abcdefghijklmnop is? Now Bashful appears afraid to ask a store employee for help. "Excuse me, why is this product a better choice for my dog and what vitamins should I feed my plants and flowers?" Seriously, how many times have you thought "Why didn't I know that or why haven’t I heard about this yet?" At this point I pass an aisle with a scent and voila...Sneezy has popped out. Embarrassed, clumsy and confused at times Dopey continues shopping. There are even times I feel like Doc, and smile at other shoppers, engage in quick 3-second conversations while waiting in line adding my insight into some topic I’ll forget as soon as I leave the store. But heck, I might have helped someone and that's just fine.

Then when I get to the register, I greet the cashier, with a Happy and Doc smile, but something happens and I feel the change coming. It starts when the cashier, who is just doing their job, asks if I found everything I need, do I have a store card and if not would I like to sign up for one. I confidently answer "Yes, no'' and "NO!" They quickly reply "Are you get 15% off your purchase today.” I quickly interject “NO.” They then proceed to ask "Paper, plastic, do you have your own bag?" At this point I magically whip out 3 of my 50 recyclable bags, I so proudly remembered, because Doc is back and smarter than ever! But, then it happens again as my face begins to turn a pinkish red color as Grumpy starts emerging. Now all I want to do is to get out of the store but I can’t. But why? Because the cashier continues to ask "Will this be cash or credit card?" to which I reply "Credit.” Soon after my products are totaled, comes the biggie! The cashier asks "Would you like to round up for the pets?” I quickly say "No”, and notice everyone else on line staring right at me. I know what they’re thinking "Really, you can't donate 7 cents to the pets.” I refocus and swipe my credit card, to which I am then prompted to answer more questions from the card reader: credit or debit followed by print, email or text receipt. I always choose paper receipt. For what reason I don’t know, because I usually throw it out when I arrive home anyway. And by the way... who are these pets? I still don’t know.

Now as I’m about to escape the store, Snow White is back for a hot second until I have to pass the Evil Queen’s guard, (the person usually standing at the exit) ready to check off your receipt. Really, are they going to actually check every one of the 250 things I bought and will they start asking me questions about the new dog food they haven’t seen yet? They give my cart a quick one-look then they say “Have a nice day!” At that point I try really hard and put on my Happy face but almost blurt out what Grumpy would say “Good riddance!”

I move quickly to the exit door singing “Heigh-ho Heigh-ho it’s out of here I go, go GO!” Hop in my car, sit back, take a deep breath and sigh then suddenly feel exhausted because guess what? Sleepy just checked in.

I like to think about the next time I venture off to go shopping. Maybe, just maybe Prince Charming will bump into me. At that point as Snow White I’ll become dramatic and think “ There's nobody like him anywhere at all” and continue thinking “Go live your life, live without me, there is no place for us together" then say "Ooh excuse me” finish shopping and leave. Then again, I just might waltz right back into the store like Snow White, find Prince Charming and look him in the eyes and say "How do you do?”

Please note I wrote this short article with no intent on degrading Snow White, the 7 Dwarfs or other characters from the beloved Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs movie I grew up loving. Also, I'm happily married to my Prince Charming, and I look forward to hearing how you met yours.

Looking for more fun lifestyle articles check out Kids, Now That You're Older Guess What?

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